Last Week's Picks Against the Spread:
Joe: 7-7 (15-13 overall)
Mike: 8-6 (17-11 overall)
Flashes of Brilliance:
Joe: "PLEASE BROWNS, ONE WEEK OF GOOD FOOTBALL. ONE ****ING WEEK! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?" (Cleveland wins 35-14.)
Mike: "Peyton will figure it out as the Ravens are embarrassed in a blowout." (Indy wins 31-3.)
Tennessee (-8) at Kansas City
Joe: TEN. Kerry Collins comes close to giving VY his job back in this trap game in KC. Unfortunately for KC, they suck and can't overcome a sluggish performance by the league's only remaining unbeaten.
Mike: TEN. I haven't hopped on the Titan bandwagon yet. Maybe it's that Jeff Fisher mustache. What is he hiding under there? Chief fan can't be happy that KC resembles an expansion team and they're only getting worse. Keeping TGonz around won't help the locker room atmosphere.
San Diego (-1) at Buffalo
Joe: SD. San Diego is pulling it together despite Norv Turner being their head coach. They will win a tight one in Buffalo but they will have to come from behind. (Paging Jeff Gar-SEE-uh)
Mike: BUF. The Bills are reminiscent of the early 90s Browns. Buffalo is improving each season and just as they're ready to turn the corner ... rumors swirl that they could be leaving town. I like the Bills and their weather against this overrated SoCal team.
Pittsburgh (-10) at Cincinnati
Joe: PIT. Poor Paul Brown Stadium will be converted into a 2nd Heinz Field. Cincy fans have given up, how long before the players follow suit??
Mike: CIN. The Bengals are desparate and the Steelers will be complacent following their bye week. Ten points will be just enough for Cincy to cover this spread. (PS: I don't really believe it. Unofficially, Steelers by 30.)
Baltimore (+2) at Miami
Joe: MIA. One more week of riding this Miami craze can't hurt. Plus who doesn't hate Baltimore, with their murderers and whatnot. I'm amazed Ricky William's short term memory loss hasn't come back to hurt the Dolphins with all these new plays and formations, that's the most certain way I can tell he has quit the chronic.
Mike: MIA. I love the wildcat. But shouldn't they have given the formation a more aquatic name? I would have named it The Porpoise which would make Ronnie Brown the All-Porpoise Back. Whatever it is, it hasn't been stopped. The Ravens are overrated with tough teams on their horizon.
Dallas (-7) at St Louis
Joe: STL. Upset special. This is the week it implodes for Dallas. Poor Brad Johnson doesn't know what he is in for everytime he calls/runs a play that doesn't involve God's Gift TO. His ears might be bleeding by the end of the game. Anyone know who the 3rd string QB is for Dallas....hello, Brooks Bollinger. Bulger to Holt torches the weak secondary for America's (Most Wanted) Team.
Mike: DAL. With half their roster injured or suspended, the famous cheerleaders will inspire their team to victory ... one way or another. Where have I seen this movie before? STL had a big emotional win last week but let's be real.
Minnesota (+3) at Chicago
Joe: MIN. Pretty sure AP had a good game against Chicago once before. I'm not saying he will be setting any records this game but after 2 subpar performances he will come out and re-establish himself as the best in the NFL. As for Kyle Orton, he can't be as good as he has been recently, can he???
Mike: CHI. The Vikings luck will finally run out (I said that last week, too). Chicago's defense will hold Minnesota to single digits in this low scoring game.
New Orleans (+3) at Carolina
Joe: NO. Carolina can't score with the Saints. Brees is on a roll towards MVP consideration. That said, it won't be a blowout until late.
Mike: NO. You can't stop the Saints. Drew Brees might be promoted to Pope if he keeps this up.
San Francisco (+11) at New York Giants
Joe: NYG. The Giants are pissed, at least I would be if I got spanked by the Browns on national TV. Expect a lot of rushing yards and couple TDs from Manning to Burress for the Giants. San Fran should start warming their 2nd and 3rd string QBs for this one.....any guesses....Shaun Hill and Jamie Martin, I know I got shivers when I read those names too.
Mike: NYG. Talk about David and Goliath. Think the Giants want to decimate a team after last week's all-around loss at Cleveland? Giants double the 11 point spread and then some.
Detroit (+9) at Houston
Joe: HOU. Detroit is the answer to any other team's ills. Dan Orlowioeurheguhsky is not the answer, Mario Williams will have another multiple sack game, and Houston rolls by 20+.
Mike: HOU. Nobody in Detroit is happy, the QB situation is unsettled and they just traded away their best player. Motown has turned into No-town. As in No Wins. At least they fired Millen.
New York Jets (-3) at Oakland
Joe: OAK. The Raiders have their one good game of the year and Favre has his 4 int game. Still comes down to final possession because Oakland is just that bad.
Mike: NYJ. I believe in the Power of Favre. The Jets roll big over the mess by the Bay. (Breaking News: Al Davis is even older.)
Cleveland (+7) at Washington
Joe: CLE. I picked them last week so I have to stay on the Cleveland train. I'm very worried about you being there and ruining everything. *(Insert Winslow Injury Comment Here) Winslow punches out Redskin player after rude comment but not until after handling two balls in Washington's endzone.
Mike: CLE. Not only will the Browns cover the spread, they will win this one outright. Why? Because of me. I'll be in Sec 106.
Indianapolis (-1) at Green Bay
Joe: IND. The impossible comeback in Houston has sparked the Indy offense and it will carry over to this game against a weak GB D. Green Bay is crumbling and will lose by 2 touchdowns. What was the QB's name who used to play there....
Mike: IND. The Colts were disorganized and unhealthy to start the year but are gathering momentum. The Packers are at the wrong place at the wrong time.
Seattle (+11) at Tampa Bay
Joe: TB. Seattle won't score 10 in the lowest rated Sunday night game in years. I almost passed out from boredom just thinking about this game. Way to come through schedule-makers.... Desperate Housewives never looked so good.
Mike: TB. Every week, I find there's a new Worst Team of the NFL. This week, that honor goes to Seattle. Sorry Charlie, but Tampa is gonna roll like it's 2003.
Denver (+3) at New England
Joe: DEN. Matt Cassell has a near-Brady experience with a 300 yd, 2-3 TD game but New England's D is too old and slow to keep up with Denver. In the highest scoring game of the week, Denver outlasts New England.
Mike: DEN. I really didn't think the Pats would be this bad without Tom Brady. Maybe he really is/was that good. My pick for Denver isn't a vote for them as much as a vote against New England.
