Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Week 3 Picks
Well since my morning was derailed by attempting to assemble a charcoal grill these picks will have to be cut short as well. I know, everyone stop crying. Things will get better.
NY GIANTS 3 Tennessee
Mike: NYG. Vince Young is a mystery, wrapped in an enigmy and vastly underperforming on my fantasy team. The Titans will lose then immediately trade for Washington's Albert Haynesworth, so the Redskins hope.
Joe: TEN. CJ2K finally breaks loose for 200 for the first time this year. Won't be the last time.
Final: TEN 29-10 (Joe)
NEW ENGLAND 14 Buffalo
Mike: BUF. If there's any city in America that outCleveland's Cleveland, it might be Buffalo. It'll be a shame when they lose their team.
Joe: NE. There aren't enough points for me to pick the Bills. They have scored 17 total this year. NE by 30+.
Final: NE 38-30 (Mike)
BALTIMORE 10½ Cleveland
Mike: CLE. Let's be real. The Browns needed to win the first two games of the season to have a chance this year. They stand at 0-2, two losses by a combined five points and now the tough part of the schedule is here. With all the players out for this game and out for the year, the only chance the Browns have is that Joe Flacco has a horrible game. I'll cling to that hope.
Joe: CLE. As always, I pick the Browns. In the first two weeks they have received ZERO breaks. This is the game that they get those breaks and the Browns keep it close. Or they lose by 40.
Final: BAL 24-17 (M/J)
Pittsburgh 2½ TAMPA BAY
Mike: PIT. The Buccaneers are the worst 2-0 team in the NFL. Hold your tongue and say out loud: I was born on a pirate ship.
Joe: TB. I don't like the Steelers.
Final: PITT 38-13 (M/J)
Cincinnati 3 CAROLINA
Mike: CIN. The Bengals have done nothing to deserve respect but this will rectify that. Yes, rectify.
Joe: CIN. Rookie QB will not do well. Cincy by a lot.
Final: CIN 20-7 (M/J)
NEW ORLEANS 4 Atlanta
Mike: NO. The Saints lose some electric with Reggie out but they still have enough pieces in place to hold off win the division.
Joe: ATL. Matty Ice has a big game with Darren Sharper still out for NO.
Final: ATL 27-24 (J)
San Francisco 2½ KANSAS CITY
Mike: KC. Pretty soon, Singletary's going to strap on a helmet. Thing is, it would probably help.
Joe: SF. Can't see any other outcome happening.
Final: KC 31-10 (M)
MINNESOTA 10½ Detroit
Mike: DET. This is my guaranteed win. Take the Lions and the points. Then sit back and watch the hapless Lions screw themselves out of another win.
Joe: DET. They will cover and they might win. Favre doesn't want to play anymore.
Final: MIN 24-10 (XX)
HOUSTON 3 Dallas
Mike: HOU. I must be dreaming... The Cowboys start 0-3? I bet they wish they had Cleveland on their schedule.
Joe: HOU. Texans keep rollin, Cowboys roll over.
Final: DAAL 27-13 (XX)
Washington 3½ ST LOUIS
Mike: WAS. Correction: Albert Haynesworth is not Mike Shanahan's slave. Owner Dan Snyder spends the money, but his team is a mess and the fans hate him.
Joe: STL. Washington isn't that good and the Rams aren't that bad.
Final: STL 30-16 (J)
Philadelphia 3 JACKSONVILLE
Mike: PHI. We're witnessing the comeback of Michael Vick, future NFL Comeback Player of the Year. How did we not fantasy draft him? We're idiots.
Joe: PHI. Not gonna make a Mike Vick joke here but I believe he will be unleashed in this game and lift his leg all over the Jags.
Final: PHI 28-3 (M/J)
Indianapolis 5½ DENVER
Mike: IND. So long as Peyton is the quarterback of the Colts, I doubt I'll ever pick him to lose. Unless, of course, they're playing the Browns.
Joe: IND. Still can't root for Denver and there is that other QB for the Colts that is pretty good.
Final: IND 27-13 (M/J)
ARIZONA 4 Oakland
Mike: OAK. So long as Derek is the quarterback of the Cardinals, I doubt I'll ever pick them to win ever again. Unless, of course, he's playing the Browns.
Joe: OAK. Still can't pick a team that chose DA in a QB competition. Just Stupid.
Final: AZ 24-23 (M/J)
San Diego 5½ SEATTLE
Mike: SD. The Battle of the West, which means very little to those of us in the East.
Joe: SD. Seattle better enjoy that Week 1 win for a while.
Final: SEA 27-20 (XX)
MIAMI 2 NY Jets
Mike: NYJ. Oh, those rascally Dolphins with the trick formations. The Jets begin to right the ship starting with a lopsided win.
Joe: MIA. Miami will make the playoffs. The Jets not so much.
Final: NYJ 31-23 (M)
Green Bay 3 CHICAGO
Mike: CHI. Der Bears.
Joe: GB. Chicago gets a wake up call this week after a 2-0 start. Rodgers for 250 and 3 TDs.\
Final:
NY GIANTS 3 Tennessee
Mike: NYG. Vince Young is a mystery, wrapped in an enigmy and vastly underperforming on my fantasy team. The Titans will lose then immediately trade for Washington's Albert Haynesworth, so the Redskins hope.
Joe: TEN. CJ2K finally breaks loose for 200 for the first time this year. Won't be the last time.
Final: TEN 29-10 (Joe)
NEW ENGLAND 14 Buffalo
Mike: BUF. If there's any city in America that outCleveland's Cleveland, it might be Buffalo. It'll be a shame when they lose their team.
Joe: NE. There aren't enough points for me to pick the Bills. They have scored 17 total this year. NE by 30+.
Final: NE 38-30 (Mike)
BALTIMORE 10½ Cleveland
Mike: CLE. Let's be real. The Browns needed to win the first two games of the season to have a chance this year. They stand at 0-2, two losses by a combined five points and now the tough part of the schedule is here. With all the players out for this game and out for the year, the only chance the Browns have is that Joe Flacco has a horrible game. I'll cling to that hope.
Joe: CLE. As always, I pick the Browns. In the first two weeks they have received ZERO breaks. This is the game that they get those breaks and the Browns keep it close. Or they lose by 40.
Final: BAL 24-17 (M/J)
Pittsburgh 2½ TAMPA BAY
Mike: PIT. The Buccaneers are the worst 2-0 team in the NFL. Hold your tongue and say out loud: I was born on a pirate ship.
Joe: TB. I don't like the Steelers.
Final: PITT 38-13 (M/J)
Cincinnati 3 CAROLINA
Mike: CIN. The Bengals have done nothing to deserve respect but this will rectify that. Yes, rectify.
Joe: CIN. Rookie QB will not do well. Cincy by a lot.
Final: CIN 20-7 (M/J)
NEW ORLEANS 4 Atlanta
Mike: NO. The Saints lose some electric with Reggie out but they still have enough pieces in place to hold off win the division.
Joe: ATL. Matty Ice has a big game with Darren Sharper still out for NO.
Final: ATL 27-24 (J)
San Francisco 2½ KANSAS CITY
Mike: KC. Pretty soon, Singletary's going to strap on a helmet. Thing is, it would probably help.
Joe: SF. Can't see any other outcome happening.
Final: KC 31-10 (M)
MINNESOTA 10½ Detroit
Mike: DET. This is my guaranteed win. Take the Lions and the points. Then sit back and watch the hapless Lions screw themselves out of another win.
Joe: DET. They will cover and they might win. Favre doesn't want to play anymore.
Final: MIN 24-10 (XX)
HOUSTON 3 Dallas
Mike: HOU. I must be dreaming... The Cowboys start 0-3? I bet they wish they had Cleveland on their schedule.
Joe: HOU. Texans keep rollin, Cowboys roll over.
Final: DAAL 27-13 (XX)
Washington 3½ ST LOUIS
Mike: WAS. Correction: Albert Haynesworth is not Mike Shanahan's slave. Owner Dan Snyder spends the money, but his team is a mess and the fans hate him.
Joe: STL. Washington isn't that good and the Rams aren't that bad.
Final: STL 30-16 (J)
Philadelphia 3 JACKSONVILLE
Mike: PHI. We're witnessing the comeback of Michael Vick, future NFL Comeback Player of the Year. How did we not fantasy draft him? We're idiots.
Joe: PHI. Not gonna make a Mike Vick joke here but I believe he will be unleashed in this game and lift his leg all over the Jags.
Final: PHI 28-3 (M/J)
Indianapolis 5½ DENVER
Mike: IND. So long as Peyton is the quarterback of the Colts, I doubt I'll ever pick him to lose. Unless, of course, they're playing the Browns.
Joe: IND. Still can't root for Denver and there is that other QB for the Colts that is pretty good.
Final: IND 27-13 (M/J)
ARIZONA 4 Oakland
Mike: OAK. So long as Derek is the quarterback of the Cardinals, I doubt I'll ever pick them to win ever again. Unless, of course, he's playing the Browns.
Joe: OAK. Still can't pick a team that chose DA in a QB competition. Just Stupid.
Final: AZ 24-23 (M/J)
San Diego 5½ SEATTLE
Mike: SD. The Battle of the West, which means very little to those of us in the East.
Joe: SD. Seattle better enjoy that Week 1 win for a while.
Final: SEA 27-20 (XX)
MIAMI 2 NY Jets
Mike: NYJ. Oh, those rascally Dolphins with the trick formations. The Jets begin to right the ship starting with a lopsided win.
Joe: MIA. Miami will make the playoffs. The Jets not so much.
Final: NYJ 31-23 (M)
Green Bay 3 CHICAGO
Mike: CHI. Der Bears.
Joe: GB. Chicago gets a wake up call this week after a 2-0 start. Rodgers for 250 and 3 TDs.\
Final:
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